Diaryland
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Latest Entry
2002-03-10 - 10:41 p.m.
i hated my last entry so this one is just filler so you don't link directly to the last one. i am trying not to delete entries because i want to keep an accurate log of myself, good, bad, ugly, stunningly brilliant, whatever. to be honest i am losing faith in my diary as a medium of...of what? what do i think it is a medium for? it began as a log of my idiosyncracies but now i think i use it to try and connect with people. so that i don't really ever have to know them in person. it occurs to me that it is the most passive-aggressive way i can fall in love with/be loved by the world. i am not too afraid of my diary. i am fucking TERRIFIED of the rest of you people. not because any of you are particularly scary but because once you know me, what else will there be? you will have nothing to do but ignore me. and i'd hate to slip into oblivion, right in front of your eyes.
so insecure. hargh!