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2003-07-23 - 2:35 p.m.
I've noticed that the stress level of my friends (as well as my own) amplifies greatly in the months just before the burn.
This makes sense, of course, because we're all planning, building, wondering and scheming for this event on top of all the other stuff that is going on in our lives.
I become dissatisfied with my work, my relationships and, in some ways, myself. [-- maybe I LET myself get this way because I know there is a coming catharsis--] I get itchy and volatile and I want to break everything I know apart and start again from scratch when everything is weightless and shiny, without stains.
Sometimes I think I see other people facing the same struggles too. It's like we're all fighting July for the chance to get in August's pants. I admit that's a poor analogy but I can't help it...it's July 23 after all.
Not that I don't like July -- I'd like it a hell of a lot more if I didn't have to sit in an office, but that's another story.
Today's story is about how hard we all work to make it perfect.
Thank you, all of you, for wanting it to be perfect and for busting your asses to make something HAPPEN...it restores my faith in humanity, in passion and in creativity.
And all of it will be perfect. Even if it sucks, [which it won't] it will be perfect. That's what burning is about -- the infinite perfection of humanity: delicate, fallible, hungry and undoubtedly REAL.